How may I help you?

Today I worked with some folks on their clearance applications (this is not abnormal), and those people...I felt sorry for them.  They had such a hard time with the computer.  Neither really knew how to do a search for information on the internet.  Both were horrific at typing.  One, being fresh to English and the United States, had a horrible time spelling words we native English speakers (once adults) tend to take for granted that we know how to spell them.

I want to help.

I have for a long time now wanted to teach adults how to read, write, and use computers more effectively, appropriately, or just darn plain better.  It's not about being a "Grammar Nazi," but about helping others succeed.  How difficult must it be to navigate today's society when everyone is using technology and you can barely write a full sentence in English, or find the letters on a keyboard?

But how do I help?

Surely there are organizations or agencies or something local that does this sort of thing and maybe needs volunteers or employees.  Or...I would run one myself - a community learning center where young people can come get help with homework and adults can learn how to use the internet for job searches, the basics of using computers, reading and writing...

But how or where would I even start?

I have no idea.  I just know I have a passion and compassion for this type of thing, and it makes me sad that I've not found a way or an outlet for the skills and desire I have to teach these things.  I actually said to a guy from Liberia that I would like to teach typing and computers to people who needed it and he said he would love to come to that class because I have lots of patience.  (Little does he know!  hahaha!  But, seriously...)  I thought that was a great compliment.

And so I'm stuck.

I want to be doing something very different from what I am doing - something that pays little to nothing - and I have no way to do it.  And that is an awful feeling.

A Musical Moment

Ever have one of those moments where whatever music you were playing, singing, or listening to hits you just right?  You get goosebumps.  It fills your head and your heart and you're just so in the moment you can't possibly be pulled from it.  It's a spiritual musical moment.  I had one of those Sunday in church.  It was the last hymn of the traditional service - "A Mighty Fortress Is Our God" - Martin Luther - a Lutheran hymn to beat all Lutheran hymns.  I like it anyway and so often we only sing it on Reformation Sunday.  Well, we sang it this Sunday.  First verse had vocals, trumpet, and violin all on melody.  Second verse was vocals in two parts with a violin descant.  Third verse was vocals in two parts and violin on melody.  The last verse - oh, I loved it - was vocals on melody, and the trumpet and violin played a descant.  Of course the organ was blasting away the whole while as well.  It was wonderful!  Powerful!  The words matched the message perfectly and the music filled the sanctuary, and I was blessed to be a part of it and I got goosebumps while we were singing/playing.  I was uplifted and left on a church music high.  That's the way it's supposed to be.  And it's not that we were each perfect necessarily; it's more like we were each and every one in that place so fully in the moment that it just became huge and filled the building to bursting...or that's how it felt to me.  I wish there were more moments like that in life.  Imagine how much more positive we'd all be if we all had moments so filling!

I *heart* Matt

I have to stop and watch every time I hear the music signally the beginning of this commercial.  I like Matt.  Maybe I just feel his pain, but I want to give him a hug from the moment he says "Great" right up to him sitting alone at the campfire.  He is such a trooper!  And that little tent makes me giggle.  Landrover did a good job with this commercial.  And the guy they have playing this character does a great job just using facial expressions.  I smile every time...though probably not for the same reasons most of the general public would.

http://www.youtube.com/user/landroverusa?v=9LBC0aRY6vg


(P.S. I had different title, but it had <3 for *heart* and kept clearing out the title.  Grrr!)

Waaahmbulance Time

Today sucked.  (Start dialing, Gregory.  Yes, I am having a waaahmbulance moment.  I'm allowed to have those now and then.)

As I was saying, today sucked.  I'm not fond of June (too many ugly anniversaries).  Add humidity and heat and some really bad sleep and you have a perfect storm that wreaks havoc on me physically and mentally.  My body hurts so much and I am so tired.  It takes so much energy just to sit at a desk...and that just isn't right!  I hate humidity.  I hate it.  And if we have/had this conversation in winter I would say I hate the cold - hate it.  I don't use that word lightly - hate.  But headaches, joints that don't seem to work right, intensified general and overall pain - and then go to work and have to be pleasant to your coworkers.  Oh!  And don't forget that you must also deal with requests for information from government types who have no clue and meanwhile get done all the things you are supposed to get done that day.  Tell me if that won't affect you mentally or emotionally.
I have the right to complain sometimes and how often do I?  Here, I mean.  When's the last time I complained more or less publicly for even my grandmother to read?  Nope.  If I whine, I save it for my mother and very, very few friends because supposedly they know best or can at least tolerate my waaahmbulance moments.  But I still censor myself and don't say anything because I have yet to discover any real empathy - not sympathy - empathy.  No healthy person can really "get it."  I am always in pain.  100% of my days and nights I feel pain.
So, I'm taking a moment right now to vent...and sadly it is most likely that the only people who will see this are those same couple people who ever get to hear anything like this anyway.  But maybe it is better that way.  I don't want pity.  I don't to be treated with kid gloves.  I just don't want my...surviving...to be taken for granted.  I get up and go to work every day dragging my body behind me and worrying that I will look as pathetic as I feel because I need a place to live and food to eat and so does Samson.  Really all I want is to stay home and take care of the house, pet the dog, and take care of myself.
Is that so selfish?  I doubt it.  Can't be selfish to want to take care of yourself when the only other living being around to care for is a dog and really, he doesn't require much.  If there was another or were others living with me who also need care...I'd probably be too busy not taking care of myself to worry about being selfish.  It's my way, doubt it not.

For those of you who are oh so very confused by the waaahmbulance reference, this should clear it up.

I guess I have that out of my system now.  I can go on watching Hannity on FoxNews and thinking about how I ate too much for dinner.  Probably will head to bed soon.

Blueberry Bushes

Took me forever, but I finally got my blueberry bushes into their pots.  Between those damned birds and my slowness, no blueberries this year.  Maybe next year.

Before - empty pots.  See the good job Dad did drilling drainage holes?

During...and boy doesn't my yard need help!

Finally!  Blueberry bushes where they belong.  :-)

Pack it in mothballs.

So I took the advice of a certain mother I know and put mothballs around the garden beds.  They might be keeping the rodents out...maybe.  I can tell you what they are doing...
They are making my garden stink to high heaven!  I have to practically stick my face into my tomato plants to smell them over the stink of those darn things.
They may also be attracting birds.  There are few creatures on Earth I despise more than birds...and now they are scattering mothballs (seriously - I've found them on the ground around the garden boxes and all around the plants where they hadn't been before), and sitting in my tomato plants!!  I couldn't believe it when I saw I don't know how many birds take off out of my garden bed - out of my tomato plants!  I told the guy at Lowe's I would prefer to kill the birds, but that I was willing to settle for scaring them away.  He politely told me they didn't carry anything for killing birds.  I said I'd have to hire a neighborhood kid with a b.b. gun.  They didn't really have anything that would work for my needs.  A friend suggested I make a scarecrow.  My luck it would be like "The Wizard of Oz" and the birds would just sit on the scarecrow, too.  So, I thought maybe having a noise-maker there would make it less attractive to birds...and a butterfly wind chime might be a nice addition to the garden.  ...I might make a scarecrow just for the heck of it, though.  lol

Zucchini plants "packed" in mothballs.

My new pretty butterfly chime...a.k.a. bird deterrent.

Two things to note: 1) mothballs everywhere, 2) huge tomato plants!

You know I will let you know if the chimes help.  Ideally I'd have Samson in the backyard during the day to chase them off, but that darn dog would likely jump the fence to chase a squirrel instead.  *rolls eyes*

Jazz it up!

Found out about something to do on Tuesday nights...

http://www.jazzinjune.com/

Jazz in June in downtown Lincoln - wish I'd found out sooner!  It's outdoor, free, and family friendly!  And I'm so glad I have my parking garage for work.  Don't have to try finding a place to park with everyone else or pay an unreasonable amount of money for my car to have a place to be.  It's a few blocks to walk, but if the weather's nice, it's not bad.

I went this last Tuesday (12th) to meet my college music director, Jim Elsberry.  I wish I'd known in time to go to the first Tuesday of the concert series.  I've actually met Lao Tizer - Summer of 2006, I think.  Andrew and I stopped and listened and then chatted with him on our way out of Universal Studios.  I have one of the guy's CDs.

Anyway, the band I saw was great and I have decided to go back this coming Tuesday and the following if I'm able - preferably with a lawn chair of some sort.  Anyone want to come with me?  I have room for four people in my car.  :-)

The Darryl White Group
Jim is pals with the keyboardist (who was unbelievable, by the way).

Me with Jim...next time I'll think to take the picture before it's dark.

Check out my tomatoes!

I can't wait to have tomatoes of my own and not have to buy them at the store!  I'll buy bacon and make myself some gluten and lactose-free BLTs!  :-D

Cherry tomatoes!

Grape tomatoes!

Good ol' fashioned "will be big one day" tomatoes!  :-)

(Told you all I'd be posting all sorts of pictures of my garden no matter how boring you might find them.)

Where'd that one come from?

So...one day I went outside and discovered there was a fourth zucchini plant growing right next to the third one.  It would seem that the critters didn't get one of the two seeds they dug up when they had been digging up that one spot.  I thought they'd both gone...I guess I should have dug a little more to make sure.  If they don't choke each other out...anyone want some zucchini?  :-)

See the two plants practically growing on top of each other?
They're at the top of the picture.

Oh dear...

I must truly be an old lady.  It is not enough that I have aches and pains all the time.  (That reminds me.  I need to go put some pain patches on my back - Salonpas.  I think they help.)  I have now become in the habit of, once I am in for the evening (no more working outside, etc), putting on my pjs.  Tonight it is a less-than-young-looking nightgown.  As I put it over my head I thought, "oh dear, what have I become."  It is sad.  I apparently do not have a life and also apparently do have clothes that looks like it belongs to my mother or grandmother (sorry Mom and Grandma, but it's true).  Oh!  And then I put my bright yellow apron on over my nightgown so I wouldn't get hamburger grease or other splatters on my nightgown while I make dinner (taco macaroni).  So I am quite the vision right now in my pastel green nightgown and bright yellow apron.  ...Good thing it's just Samson and me.  (And yes, "me" is correct, for those of you who think you can outsmart the Grammar Nazi.  bwa-ha-ha-ha!)  My dinner should be ready just in time to watch "The O' Reilly Factor" on FoxNews.  Pjs, taco macaroni, and Bill O' Reilly...who could ask for a more classy evening?

It's Not All Flowers and Puppies

There is a misconception out there, perpetuated by some regarding their faith or religion, that being a member of whatever “tribe” is all flowers and puppies.  No wonder some people are turned off by the idea of “organized religion” or even faith in general.  How fake!  Let’s be real, people – and be real people!  No matter what faith or religion you ascribe to, you are still a human being.  Don’t act like you aren’t and go around thumping people with your Bible, or Koran, or Veda, or Tao-te-ching, or Book of Mormon, or any other “holy” book (or lack thereof, you atheists and agnostics out there).  Admit it.  We’re all human (yes, even you are not perfect).  Your faith and religion are not all flowers and puppies.  Here’s why.

 Not all flowers are pretty.

Not all flowers are pretty to everyone.  We all have a favorite.  Some people don’t like flowers at all.  Some flowers just look or act “different.”  So it is with people.  We are each drawn to certain types of people (physically or aesthetically).  Some people are just loners, need some sort of therapy…or are just plain mean and best left alone.  And there will always be people who are a bit or more outside what culture (whichever one you choose) would deem “abnormal” either by look or by behavior.  Going back to flowers, for example, consider peonies.  They have always creeped me out.  The ants crawling all over them to open the blossom…*shudder*…maybe that’s because I’m not fond of bugs.  Or there’s the venus fly trap.  Now that one’s different.  It’s carnivorous!  Aren’t there people like that?  And, I would maintain, there are some faiths…more like cults that are like that, too.  People can have a favorite faith or religion.  A particular message may be interesting or look good, or what’s professed could be something to which a person is (or should be) allergic, or looks plain odd.  Not every faith or religion is pretty to everyone.

Not all flowers smell nice.

Do all flowers have an aroma – a pleasant one at least?  Some people are allergic and would like to like flowers, but never can truly enjoy them.  Or some just smell better to a person than others.  For example, there’s a flowering tree in my yard that gives me a headache almost as soon as I step out of my car or out my door.  Not sure which of the two trees it is, but I sure wish I could just make it go away.  And do we go around smelling all flowers?  I like the smell of roses and carnations.  Tulips are okay, too.  Ever do a “smell” test on a situation or a person?  You walk into a situation or meet someone and think, “Hmm.  Something doesn’t smell right about this.”  I’m not talking about someone’s cologne.  It’s that gut reaction that something’s not right.  And it happens with religion, too.  You walk into a church and listen, and something just seems off.  It doesn’t pass the smell test.  You’re outa’ there and don’t go back.

Not all puppies are cute.

I’m sorry, but it’s true.  Chihuahuas are a good example.  They just aren’t cute…at least to me.  I’m sorry, but those big eared, hairless wonders, are just too funky looking for me to like.  And there are others, but of course it is all opinion.  We all have them – opinions about puppies.  And some people are cat people anyway.  So, please don’t flirt to convert.  I don’t care how cute you think you are.  Someone will not think you are cute enough to follow you to church…or find your church (or lack thereof) that attractive either…and you’ll be offended.  So avoid the offense altogether.  Be honest.  Put your cards on the table and let what happens happen.  Also, keep your eyes open.  Are you going to a church that’s a hairless wonder (or otherwise just not cute)?

Puppies chew on things.

Hide your shoes and buy some chew toys.  Word of advice to those who are consistently barraged by someone who talks ad nauseum about their beliefs: smile and nod unless you are ready to engage.  Some puppies will grow out of chewing.  Others can be trained on what is okay to chew on and what is not.  And, admittedly, there are some who will never stop.  In that case, yes, hide your shoes and anything else you value.  Try to politely disengage.  Do not call them a Bible thumper.  It’s rude and may only make things worse.  If you chewers out there have the insight to recognize you are a chewer, learn the difference between toys and shoes.  People will like you better if you don’t chew on their shoes (i.e. harping on someone else about their beliefs will annoy them at least).  Also, try to only chew on your toys when it is appropriate.  Constant squeaking sounds can only be tolerated for so long.

Puppies poop on the carpet.

Until housebroken, prepare to clean the carpet.  Similarly, the enthusiastic yet uneducated believer can get things wrong.  If you are one of those, consider this your nose being rubbed in it.  Go learn!  Study your faith and your religion.  Know the theology, the tenets, and the arguments against them.  You cannot make clear what you yourself do not know.  Don’t poop on the carpet of someone you hope to convince.  It will have the opposite effect.  Get housebroken.  If you are someone whose carpet has been soiled, put away the rolled up newspaper or magazine.  Smacking the puppy on the nose is mean and you may end up being bitten (or with more poo on the carpet).  You could probably use some housebreaking yourself.  After all, you were a puppy once, too…and maybe still are in your own beliefs.  And just because that particular puppy poops on the carpet does not mean all dogs will.  Maybe you just need to be having the debate with a more mature creature – one who knows how not to poop on the carpet.

So what just happened?  What was that all about?  If the big paragraphs were too daunting, I hope this will help.

·         Not everyone wants to join your church (or leave the one they’re in).  Grass is not always greener – not to everyone.   Accept it.

·         When you walk into a new church or come into a discussion with someone over belief, trust that little voice in your head.  Instinct is often right.  However, a word of caution: don’t confuse with instinct the nervousness that comes with entering new territory.

·         Attractiveness is in the eye of the beholder.  This is another thing to accept.

·         Do not try to force your beliefs on someone else.  Talking about it is one thing.  Being a jerk is another.

·         Tolerance first.

·         Polite disengagement second.

·         Running and hiding should be your last option and only one of desperation (as puppies will likely chase you).

·         Learn all you can about your belief and those of others; and, I might add, learn it from reputable sources.

I feel that last point is especially important – especially today when there are so many options for what to believe and where to believe it.  Knowledge is power.  Blindly believing whatever someone tells you is risky.   So always be educating yourself.  Know both sides of the story.  The more you know, the better the chances you will make a wise decision or come to a wise choice – and, one would hope, the best decision/choice for you.  This is advice that applies to parts of life outside faith/religion.

So...

If I offended you, it was not my intention.

If I caused you to think – good!  That was my intention.

If I convinced you I am both mightily opinionated and a bit touched in the head – duh.  It’s part of my charm.

More of this weekend's projects...

The second of the bigger projects for this weekend is done.  It kicked my butt!  But I won...more or less.  I am a little concerned about the tree liking to spit out little sprouts all over the darned place.  That would be annoying.  Guess we'll see.
Anyway...here's the blow by blow.  :-)

Plot out my edge - learned that from watching a lot of HGTV and DIY Network.

Digging out the flowerbed.

I'll have you know those bricks were a pain in the rear.

Ta da!  And with luck the alyssum will grow.

Now like yesterday I am nursing back pain, but added bruised knees, a blister on my right thumb, and just a little bit of sunburn.  Was very happy to shower, put on comfy pjs, and sit down on the sofa with no intentions of moving (except to make dinner).

More things blooming...

'Tis the season!  :-)

I almost have mums again!

Hyacinth going nuts - blue and pink!

Fruit!

My first blueberries!

Ate them right away.  They were tiny.  One tasted like a plum and the other had no flavor.  Hmm.  Oh well.  I think there will be more.  The two blueberry bushes are my ambitious gardening choices...well...I guess having the whole garden is ambitious since I've never had one before.  :-)

Roses are pink

Just yesterday this was a bud.  Today it's fully bloomed.  Amazing!



This Weekend's Projects

Well, I'm pretty sure I've done a number on my back already.  Whoops.  I accomplished a couple tasks, but if the weather is gross tomorrow, it will end there.

Hoping the bouncy, flappy butterflies gives critters pause about jumping into my garden boxes.

Finally planted my spinach.  Doesn't look like much now, but...

This is the big project.  Here's the "Before" shot.

Well, this part is done.  Kind of was winging it, so hopefully I did well.

Putting the flowerbed around the tree like the one around the mailbox is going to be even more of pain than where I'm at physically now.  Rumors are the weather is not going to cooperate tomorrow, so I might just be maintaining the flowers until I can actually get them into their dirt.  No pain, no gain, they say (whoever "they" are).  Well, I definitely have the pain part down.  I hope I can finish my weekend projects so I can have the full gain.  ...But...at least I was able to get a few things done.  The tree will still be there...begging to be dealt with...like the dryer that just buzzed at me for the hundredth time.

Stupid Critters

Something stole the cherry tomato in the picture several posts ago.  So mad!  And there appear to be some bugs I can't see nibbling on the leaves of my cucumbers and pepper plants.  The rest of my garden seems fine...ish.  Found a spot where it looks like a squirrel must have been digging a little hole.  Something regularly plucks the beginnings of strawberries off my strawberry plants.  And this evening I found a blueberry in with the carrots.  I've tried chili powder.  I don't have any coffee grounds.  Mom suggests moth balls.  Don't know yet what else to do except put up fence I can't get through either.  So obnoxious.  I'm going to Lowe's tomorrow.  Hopefully someone there can point me toward something to at least stop the bugs.

Just saying...

There are some people in this world who have no business procreating.  It makes me so mad sometimes I could cry.

Just saying.