I blame my mother.

So, Mom tells me yesterday how she has already finished the book I gave her for Christmas.  I get home and look around.  I'm surrounded by books.  I would probably have to quit working and sit at home for years before I'd get all of them read...which sounds better to me than most people might believe and certainly than they'd wish on themselves.  I decided that simply won't do.  I can't quit working, but that doesn't mean I can't get after some reading.

Tonight the movie version of Bill O'Reilly's book Killing Lincoln is on the FoxNews Channel.  Figured if I'm going to watch the movie (which is starting right now), I should read the book.  So I started reading it last night.  I've read a little bit tonight while other things were on and before picking up the technology.

So I will have to make sure I start carrying this book around with me and find times to read.  I love to read and have many, many options from which to choose.  So why don't I?  Time?  Energy?  Lighting?  The television?  So many sorry excuses!  I guess this is a little bit of a pre-New Year's resolution except that I'm not promising to read more or a certain number or anything like that.  Just feeling that if I'm going to own so many books I aught to at least try to read a greater portion of them...

...I would wait until I retire and have more time, but my luck the economy will never allow that, so...I bow to the jealousy of Mom's managing to read a whole book in a short time.

"You're cranky! You need a nap!"

Indeed!  I don't know how I get through some days.  I was reminded again today what the little actress I can be.  I don't know how I got through my work today, making newbies laugh, being patient with what surely was the embodiment of ignorance (or something) when all I wanted to do was be at home asleep in the recliner.

And I did fall asleep in the recliner tonight.  I put on my pjs, made some dinner, ate a whole bunch and then rocked myself to sleep and ended up missing the weather report.  (Darn it!)  I fell asleep in the recliner yesterday afternoon and the day before, too.  There's something about this chair!

In part this is my own fault.  I'm not actually putting in enough hours in bed asleep.  I have too many bad habits that shrink my sleep time and probably affect the quality, too.  There's a New Year's resolution in there somewhere...if I was the type to make one of those.

Not the Usual "Buddy" Movie

I just watched a movie that I don't even know how it made it onto my Netflix list.  It was amazing.  I've seen Robert Downey Jr. before (who hasn't?), but not respected his acting so much as in this movie.  I've seen Jamie Foxx in things before, too, but talk about an unbelievably difficult role!  It was very moving.  And, did I mention it's a true story?  It's called "The Soloist."

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-OdIYUPc40M

No Resolve

We're only a few days away from the new year.  2015.  Already.  Am I the only one in shock?  Probably not.  Coming to the realization the next year is so close has given me pause once or twice.

 It's already all over the television about the next holiday specials and, of course, New Year's resolutions.  I guess a lot of people make those.  I don't.  Never have.  I understand the concept.  The logic isn't lost on me.  New year, new you, blah, blah, blah.  My usual excuse is that I don't like setting myself up for failure.  (They say most resolutions are never kept, so I resolve to not put myself in that position.)  Or, maybe I'm just lazy.

It's not that there aren't things to change.  There are always things I would like to change.  I just really lack the desire to, upon the start of the new year, say "this year I will..." and then somehow make whatever it is happen.

For example, could I resolve to not eat this whole frozen pizza in one sitting?  Sure...but why?  Just because I shouldn't eat a whole pizza?  (It's not that big and who else is going to eat it?  Samson?  He probably wouldn't mind, but he shouldn't eat that much pizza either.)

Sometimes I think that the whole resolution thing is horribly cliche.  And I'm great at rationalizing.  But, I also know that's what I'm doing.  Of course, life being so incredibly unpredictable, managing my resolve would make it easier to go with the flow.  So, maybe this coming year should be different.  Maybe this time I could actually make a resolution and then magically keep it.  Maybe, just maybe, this time I will resolve to not resolve to not make any resolutions.  Then, if I decide to be resolute about something, I'm not undoing a resolution already.

Oh.  And I did eat the whole pizza.  What?!  It's really good pizza!

Night at the Museum

Friday night I drove to Omaha and picked up my nieces for a trip around the world in three hours of adventure at The Durham Museum.  We picked up a couple passports at the entrance and began a journey through the Christmas sights and sounds of Ireland, Germany, Japan, Africa, and so many others.  We explored trains, a Native American campsite, discussed buffalo versus bison, and when the globe-trotting was done, we listened to the original "How the Grinch Stole Christmas" while driving to Lincoln.  Whew!  That's a lot of adventure for an old Auntie like me!  And totally worth it.  :)

Pausing to watch the German folk-dancing.

A fun game with lights from the ceiling and friends from Asia.

Ivy says this is a bison, not a buffalo.

Stopped at a train crossing.

Walking the length of the train.

This time the dancers are from Africa.

A selfie with Auntie on the shuttle back to the car.

It will be a long week.

It occurs to me that Sunday, when I leave home for the choir concert, I will not be back for a week.  What?  Yes, that's right.  When I leave the house Sunday afternoon for the concert, I will not be back until the following Sunday.  Why?  Colorado and turkey.  I will be going straight from the concert to the airport to be in Colorado for work Monday through Wednesday.  I get back Wednesday evening and head straight from the airport to the farm for Thanksgiving and come back home on Sunday.

(Dear robbers and other breakers and enterers, please finish the leftovers, put into the laundry hamper any of my clothes you try on, and help yourself to the tech.  Half of it only half works anyway.  P.S. Jesus loves you and the books and DVDs that say so can be found in the living room and master bedroom.  Check them out.  Oh, and please shut the door behind you when you leave so the critters don't get in and the heater doesn't run constantly.  Thanks.)

So this week is about getting ready to be gone and I am failing miserably at doing that.  Next week will be all work and travel and wearing myself out.  I am looking forward to getting to the farm and stopping for a while...if Black Friday shopping with my parents for new phones can be considered stopping.

This gave me goosebumps.

Watch and listen.  These people are amazing.  I really did get goosebumps.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ifCWN5pJGIE

Farmers and Veterans

Two of my favorite types of people.  Have been seeing the commercials for this organization.  Interesting.

http://www.farmvetco.org/

Unreal!

And I missed it!!  I'm so sad...glad I got to see my nieces, but seriously!  This crazy!

http://espn.go.com/video/clip?id=11438998&ex_cid=sportscenterFB

Yuck!

Working off and on from home today after just a couple hours in the office.  Managed to acquire some upper respiratory garbage yesterday on my way home from Colorado.  So I decided it was better to feel like crap at home than in the office where I might just make everyone around me sick.  I stopped in the little clinic we now have onsite and the nurse practitioner (or whatever she is) suggested trying over the counter measures for now and if I'm still ill next week, she'll prescribe something.  Uh...okay.  So my gunky nose and throat came home with me.  And then I logged into work.  Not exactly the resting I was told several times I'm supposed to be doing.  But I did take an approximately 30-minute nap.  Doesn't that count for something?
And as I lie here on the sofa between asleep, watching the news, logging back into work, I keep thinking of all the things around the house and outside that need to be done.  I have zero time and even less energy.  Working 60+ hours a week is doing me no favors...except for the money to order a new battery for the lawnmower.
I need another nap.

... And I miss my dog.  He's at the farm with my parents while I was traveling.  It's strange to be in the house without him.

Something to listen to...

It's a YouTube "video" but it's about listening, not watching.  It isn't our best version, but it's the only recording we had and it still gives me goosebumps at the end.

Eric, Sarah, and Corrine...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AhnVVUd0Jqw

TV Flashback Thanks to a Commercial

This was great!!  They don't make 'em like this anymore.  :)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1XonxZvXEPE

Getting Ready

Unbelievably, the annual post Independence Day, post Corrine's b-day, movies on the barn party is only one week away.  We are already in preparation mode as Mom as begun food preparation, I'm gathering "materials" and thinking ahead to the theme, games, and et cetera.  This should be really fun.  And, it's getting here really fast!

A little hard work...

Even when I'm not at work, I end up working...just a very different kind - hard labor.  Mom came to visit and we worked hard the whole time she was here.  What were we doing, you ask?  A lot, and it wasn't easy.

First we begin cleanup.

Before Picture

 

Raking, weed pulling, leaf collecting.

Out with the old "dirt" and in with the new.

Grandma Geu's irises have finally been planted.

 

Hens and chicks have been planted.

Trimming the chicken wire...in the rain.

 

It was a dirty job...

...but someone had to do it.

Our work here is done...ish.

Come next year there should be all sorts of irises blooming.  Meanwhile, I have a few thin areas to fill in with the river rock.  Then this will truly be done.  Thanks to my mom for all her help!  It never would have happened without her.  Can't wait to see how things grow next Spring!

I laughed so hard I cried!!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bPfZ78m3xZo

Seriously!  Laughed so hard it hurt!  Still laughing!

Patience is a virtue...or a superpower.

My siblings would probably say that I'm (and I quote from their childhood) "picky and mean."  And I tell the new hires I work with that I'm only picky and mean because the government makes me be that way - I'm just the messenger.  But I am very often told by folks (outside the family, anyway) that I'm "so patient!"  (Note to non-grammarians: the exclamation point is inside the quotation marks because it's part of the quote.  It would be outside the quotations if it was meant to make the sentence as a whole on the exclamation.  Just saying.)  Am I?  Did I keep from calling anyone stupid?  Did I stay all day instead of packing up and going home only a couple hours in out of sheer frustration?  So far as I recall, I did not call anyone any rude names or words, and I have witnesses who can attest to the fact I remained all day.  I know I joked, laughed, chatted, smiled, reassured, wished well, et cetera.

...In my head I was screaming something along the lines of "MAKE IT STOP!!!"

Most of the time, grinning and bearing it, being polite when I'd much rather ask someone how they managed to survive this long, and in general be nice when I feel anything but just makes me tired and feels like an expenditure of energy far from worth it.  But there are moments when I think maybe, at least for other people, it is worth it.  I can think of few other places where I come around a corner and hear my name called out in a sort of "nice to see you" way or people smile and wave from across the room.  I've heard from people themselves or from third parties about this fabled and inordinate amount of patience it's rumored I have.

Ninety percent of the time I haven't the foggiest idea of who it is calling out or waving to me beyond the fact that it is someone whom I assisted with the process on their first day.  I'm afraid it would horribly disappoint most of them to find out I don't remember who they are or the life story they told me.  Worse yet would be to realize how little interest I had, how frustrated I actually was, maybe even how tired it left me.  It is a strange thing to me that anyone would want to seek out the person who is so closely associated with the incredibly daunting process through which I have to get these people and their paperwork, let alone be happy to see her.  Perhaps I'm too much an introvert to wrap my mind around these things.  Perhaps I'm too cynical or just too tired.  But it does take the edge of the tiredness and frustration to have sometimes entire groups of people cheerily greet me or have someone go out of their way to stop by and say "hi" just because he or she saw me from across the way.

Perhaps, I mean just maybe, maybe I am better at what I do even than I realized.  Still rather certain I'm too tired and cynical, though, so I don't think I'll get too excited over my near rock star status in our Omaha office, not at this juncture anyway.  And, while there is evidence that I am serving a purpose for others, I see little evidence of doing myself any favors.  I will buy the idea that at least some days patience is a virtue I have.  If it turns out to even be the superpower it's purported I have...I deny it completely.  Superpowers invite arch nemeses, and...Hey...Wait a minute...There might be evidence for this after all.  But if you go around telling everyone, I'm confiscating your decoder ring and kicking you out of the fan club.

My Brother the Hero!

The shelf-adjustment party was a great success, so it was followed immediately by a plumbing party.  Justin was the hero of both parties doing such stunts as inhaling sawdust and taking several involuntary showers.  The new refrigerator is now hooked up for ice and water and is in its proper place in the kitchen.  Victory is ours!

"I'm going to just man through this, okay?"

Drip...drip...drip...

Ta da!

'Tis June

Well, another June has arrived.  I've not really been looking forward to it.  (I haven't looked forward to a June in years and years and...hmmm...more than a decade.)  Work is about to take a turn for the absolutely ugly.  The rest is, well, the usual issues I have with June which I won't go into here.  That's for my therapist to be paid to hear.  However, there are some new things that so far are not bad.

I have a new membership with the YMCA and have started going regularly to a couple classes and to swim and supposedly work out but haven't actually done that yet as I was only just taught how to use the machines on Saturday and haven't really found a moment to dive in and use them since then.  Supposedly this will help me meet some goals, get healthier, reduce stress blah, blah, so on and so forth.

I spent oodles and gobs of money on a new refrigerator to replace the one that came with the house.  Turns out I have this thing about frozen milk and spoiled food - I don't like it.  Also, the old one was not sealing well at all (understatement).  It was time for that sucker to go, so it has.  The delivery guys were nice kids.  (The one named Justin was as much a wise*** as a certain little brother I have.)  Samson didn't seem to mind them once they stopped moving the monster machines around.  The new fridge is all sorts of fancy...and a measly half inch too tall for the space.  So Saturday I'm having a shelf adjustment/removal party.  If we get real ambitious, we might connect the water, too...if we get ambitious...which would include me going to Lowes to buy the kit to do so.  We'll see.  I'm just happy to have a refrigerator that is more energy efficient and that will supposedly not ruin my expensive food...even if it is sticking way out into the kitchen for now.

Dad came last week and helped me secure two thirds of the garden to keep the rodents and birds out.  Only the tomatoes, pepper, spinach and potatoes are exposed and so far, the critters still seemed a bit in shock after all the activity back there.  We've only had one incident instead of daily ones.  The berries, zucchini, onions, and carrots are safe and sound and had been the most at risk.  It is nice to know that I will actually get to eat my own strawberries this year (had one already)!  I don't have to keep replanting the zucchini anymore either.  Now it's up to the weather and Samson and whatever all natural remedies I can find out about to keep the only uncaged part of the garden safe from those little rat ******** and all their little friends.

"Jazz in June" is going on in downtown Lincoln on Tuesday nights.  http://www.jazzinjune.com/index.html  Hopefully I'll get to at least one concert this year.

I just noticed how late it is.  Completely missed "The O'Reilly Factor."  Dang it!  Oh well.  I finished watching this disc of "Peter Gunn" episodes.  I can send it back to Netflix tomorrow.  I suppose that's a good thing, too...Ooo!  I love cable television sometimes.  I was able to start O'Reilly over again.  I get to watch it before it replays at 10:00.  That's good, too.

They Don't Make Them Like This Anymore

I don't know why, but I am enamored with Peter Gunn - the TV show, that is.  The wit, the music...  Well, maybe you should check it out for yourself.  I just watched this episode and loved it.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EkWHWr3Oyeo

It's less than 30 minutes of your time, but make sure you pay attention.  The best moments might be missed if you look away or stop listening.  :)

I'm such a nerd.

I am loving this show...probably because I'm such a language nerd.  But, really, if you've ever wondered why we say some of the things we do or where some phrases come from, this is a fun way to find out.

http://www.history.ca/americas-secret-slang/

He's Bringing Reading Back...

I couldn't believe it when I heard about this.  Then I watched the video (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t8DLihxcj14) and sat there saying "I remember that episode...and that one...and that one..."  Trek fans will love the ending of the video.  Those of us who grew up taking a look in a book will be waxing nostalgic for a while after watching this.

Best cartoon I've seen in a long time!

I have to thank my kid brother for texting me Friday night and telling me about this, suggesting I watch it.  Which I did and it was worth it and thensome.  I searched for it on YouTube for those of you who don't have Netflix, but I could only find it in pieces.  But don't let that stop you from going out onto the web and checking it out.  And if you have Netflix, look this up and watch it.  It's "Batman: The Brave and the Bold" episode 24.  The episode title is "Mayhem of the Music Meister."  It's hilarious and incredibly clever.  If you are a musician (especially with leanings toward musicals), you'll enjoy this.  I laughed so hard and so often.  I think if I'm ever feeling grumpy, watching this would totally make me feel better.  :)

Take It Easy

So the chiropractor told me no less than twice today that I need to take it easy this weekend...which only served to make me think even more about all the things I want(ed) to do or get done or try to do or try to get done this weekend.  Followed those thoughts with one of "What the heck do I do to 'take it easy'?"  I keep thinking of chores.  Finally my brain wandered around to TV...All the shows are in summer repeats now.  I already watched all the season finales.  And, of course, hundreds of channels and I couldn't find anything to watch.  So I turned to my trusty Netfilx.  I watched some foreign film on DVD that's been sitting around waiting for me to have two hours to kill.  It was...different.  Probably would have been better if I didn't understand just enough Spanish to know that the subtitles were not very exact translations...as in sometimes entire sentences were missing.  Oy.  I think I will peruse my list for something interesting to watch online from bed now.

...Will that have been enough taking it easy that I can do all sorts of chores and yard work tomorrow?  Don't want this easy taking thing to go to my head.  I'll get used to it, my yard will go to the weeds, the garden to the squirrels, and I will end up living in squalor...hahahahahaha   Right.

...But it is tempting to come to a full stop for a whole weekend...

Season Finales

Oh my goodness.  Season finale time...and it has been so awesome!

Garden Update

The bunny carcasses (of which there were five in the end...I won't go into details because it's yucky) have gone the way of burial at compost heap.  I followed that up with putting a bag of near mud (formerly a normal bag of garden soil) in a garden box and finishing planting the last of the tomatoes, and planted my green pepper plant.  All that's left to plant in that box are potatoes.  Once that's done, what remains will be the berry box which is half done right now.  Can't do things the easy way.  Probably should have changed clothes before I did all that work this evening, but at least it's done.

Weekend Storm Casualties

Well, I don't have baby bunnies in my garden anymore...live ones anyway.  I've counted four dead baby bunnies.  One was on the ground outside the garden box.  Two were just outside the hole and one is still in the hole.  They were fine when I left for the farm on Friday and they were dead Monday morning when I went out back to see what damage the Sunday storms had done.  Since Samson was with me the whole time, I know he didn't have a "paw" in it.  I'm guessing the deluge Sunday was filling their nest and they tried to escape but couldn't survive the weather anymore outside than inside it.  I feel a little guilty for wishing they were gone (and suggesting stew meat).  I'm also a fair bit grossed out and not sure what to do with the corpses.  I need to take care of it soon, though, before Samson finds the one outside the garden box and before there are other vermin or varmint in my garden because of them.  Yuck!  *shudder*

Foster Care Awareness Month

May is Foster Care Awareness Month.  Lutheran Family Services has provided yard signs for those who would like to put them out for the month.  They dropped off several at my house today.  I still have a couple left if anyone's interested.

It's Garden Time!

I way overdid it physically this last weekend.  Bags of garden soil, plants, yard work...my body is angry, but the edges are trimmed, a friend mowed the majority of the yard, and the garden is started...I'd call that worth the effort.  I'm a little worried about the plants that aren't in the ground yet as it storms, but most of the garden is set as of this afternoon in the 98-degree temperature.  Just potatoes, one tomato plant, the pepper plant, and a blueberry bush left to go...and I might plant some spinach yet, too...maybe some more strawberries...okay, so maybe there's more to do than I thought.  But there are strawberries planted and blossoming.  The onions and carrots and zucchinis are in and most of the tomato plants are in the ground.  I'm looking forward to this year's garden.  As Mom described, I have soup or stew planted in my garden.  All I need to add is meat...Actually...

I'm not that vicious, really.  They are cute, but they are in the way!  I still have a pepper and a tomato plant to put in that box and these baby bunnies are quite in the way.

Hello, Thunderstorm.

Oh dear!  Poor Samson.  We just had a huge crack of thunder.  He popped up off the floor and started barking like crazy at the front door.  Not sure who he thought could knock on a door that way, but he wanted that sound-maker to know there was a big dog on guard here.  Sounds like some heavy drops out there now...maybe even some hail, and the sky is a very different color now from when I got home.  'Tis the season!  Samson better save his voice.

Book Review

I would spend all day reading if I had the time.  Currently I'm working on Killing Jesus by Bill O'Reilly and Martin Dugard.  It's excellent.  It reads like a story almost more than a history book (even though that's what it is) while being incredibly educational.  I thought I knew a lot about this time and place and its people, but I have been learning new things all through the book.  I have just finished the chapter for the Wednesday before the crucifixion.  I think I should make sure I have plenty of time to sit and read before I start on the next chapters.  I suspect it will be difficult to put the book down once I get into the arrest and crucifixion parts.

Other good things about the book...there's an index, maps, footnotes, the writing is so clear and easy to read that you don't have to be any kind of rocket scientist to understand.  And if non-fiction isn't your thing, I would recommend reconsidering or making an exception.  I have Killing Lincoln sitting on my shelf.  I might have to read that next.  I need to get Killing Kennedy so I can have read all three.  And the authors are working on a fourth book now related to World War II.  I'm turning into a history junky.  :)

One Last Update

One last update regarding the little girl for whom I was doing respite care and had considered for placement...

I found out she will be going to a half-sibling in another state.  Also, her behavior has become quite, well, difficult, but her foster family agreed to keep her for the remainder of the school year so she wouldn't have to change schools.  Once school is out, she'll be at some group home of sorts until it's time for her to go to her new permanent home.

So, it would seem that following my instincts was a good thing.  I sure hope being with that half-sibling will be what they both need.

It was amazing!!

If you didn't make it to one of the concerts this weekend, you so missed out!  Both were excellent, but this afternoon's concert which included the chamber orchestra, was incredible!  The experience of singing with the orchestra only compounded the enjoyment of this music - words that connect our heritage from generation to generation and tie the church back even to its roots in Judaism.  And the movement of the music from high to low, soft to a sanctuary absolutely overflowing with sound...It took an extreme amount of focus to not become too caught up in the music and just start crying.  (Sappy, yes, but trust me, it was that good.)

Now I'm kind of sad it's over and we have to wait several months before the next chance to do something even close to like it.  It's nice to know my Sunday afternoons are free again, but music helps sustain me and this particular pair of pieces was doing a most excellent job of doing so.

Anyway, the good news for those who missed the concerts is that today was recorded.  Assuming there will be CDs, I will be sure to get one or two which may be lent out if I can trust you to guard it with your life and return it.

Meanwhile, if you are feeling sad about missing other concerts, there are some recordings on Lincoln Lutheran Choir's website.  I was not a participant in all of them, but at least a couple are recent enough to have included me.  Feel free to check those out at http://lincolnlutheranchoir.org/ under the "Listen" link.

Concerts this weekend!

The Lincoln Lutheran Choir's spring concerts are this weekend.  The music we're doing this time is my favorite to date.  I'm really enjoying it - and the history to it as well.  It's fun to sing and the lyrics tie back to antiquity.

Here's a sample of one of the pieces we're doing.  (It's not all this mellow, by the way.)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j20hysVNyOE

The other large piece we're doing is...huge!  And amazing!  And written by a young man (disturbingly young) from Seward, NE.  The choir is premiering it.
The Saturday concert will be just organ and voices, but Sunday there will be an orchestra - strings, brass, percussion, the whole nine yards.

So, I hope folks can find some time and make their way to one of the concerts this weekend.  It will be a real treat (and there are always refreshments afterward, too, if that helps entice anyone).

You're never too old...

...to play.

Dad and Justin at play

#8

#8:  If I want to have nothing but toast for dinner, I have nothing but toast for dinner.

Nebraska is pretty neat - neater than even I knew.

I just watched a show on the Smithsonian Channel (yea for cable television, and yeah, who knew the Smithsonian had their own channel) called "Arial America."  Each episode looks at the history and landscape of one of the 50 states.  Tonight was all about Nebraska.  The "fly over" type of views of things like wagon wheel ruts from the Oregon and Mormon trails, fields of every shape and size, so on and so forth was very cool.  I learned some things I didn't know, saw the building I work in (boo!) and saw places I can't believe I haven't visited.  Why have I never seen Chimney Rock?!  I really need to drive out there and see it.  Watching that show made me want to get in the car and drive around Nebraska just checking things out.

#7

#7: When something doesn't go right or doesn't go as expected/planned, I've no one but myself to blame.

If you like history...

You'll enjoy this.  Note: I have passed every quiz I've taken so far.  :)

http://www.billoreilly.com/pg/jsp/general/fun.jsp

What do you think?

When I saw this, I was shocked.  I feel I must agree with the people who think this is a bad idea.

http://www.foxnews.com/on-air/fox-news-reporting/index.html#/v/3405275804001

What do you think?

Kid Update

For those who don't see or talk to me regularly, I owe an update regarding the foster/adopt business.

I decided not to take permanent placement of the kiddo for whom I'd been doing respite.  It was very difficult coming to that decision - very difficult.  Ultimately, there just isn't enough of me to go around to fully support her.  I did offer to remain a respite provider for her.  Unfortunately, I've heard nothing since then since the caseworker changed.  I know there was a lot down the road for her that was going to be very difficult and pray she is doing alright.

So I guess we're back to search mode.  I was contacted by a caseworker in Ohio about a brother and sister.  I'm not sure what I should do there.  Ohio isn't exactly down the street, so prayers about what to do there are welcome.

Sorry that wasn't better news.  I am disappointed, but believe it was the right decision.  The stories with these kids is so heart-breaking, you just want to love and help them all.

#6

#6:  And when the schedule is downright stupid, the only one who suffers is me.

#5

#5: When plans change, there is only one schedule to consider and I'm in charge of it.

Attention Techie Types!

I need your assistance.  I have Norton on my computer, but it is expiring.  Should I renew or get something different to protect my computer?  Thoughts?  Preferences?  Text me.  Call me.  Tell me the next time you see me.  And thank you in advance for your suggestions and help!  :)

I thought of two more.

#3: More grown-up beverage for me.

#4: Whatever I watch on TV is what I want to watch on TV.

I'm going to make a list.

I have decided I'm going to make a list of things that are good about living by myself to help me feel better about being alone.  Here are my first two.

#1: I can stand in the middle of my living room in nothing but Marvin Martian slippers and it's totally okay.

#2: I get all the popcorn shrimp to myself.

An Interesting Interview

Good company in which to be - I can relate to so much of what he talks about in this interview.  The interview was really interesting.

http://www.billoreilly.com/site/rd?satype=13&said=12&url=%2Fb%2FA-Conversation-with-Bill-OReilly%2F-207486031597599487.html

...And I'm reading the book right now.  So far, it's pretty good.  Already learning things I didn't know about the Roman Empire...Yes.  Yes, I am a nerd.

Another One

Are you tired of the movie trailers?  Simon Pegg's movies have grown on me.  This one has no zombies and no gore, no aliens, but it's amusing and even has a moral to the story.  I liked it.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=thIpzoZYxO4

About Something

We all want our lives to be about something.  If we write, we want it to be about something others want to read.  If we sing, we want it to be about something people want to hear.  If we do, we want it to be something important, useful, helpful, meaningful.  And the pride in us wants to be recognized for it at least a little bit - just enough to know what we're about is that about which we are supposed to be.

Unless we are particularly prideful, even that is not the most important thing.  Whether we feel deep down inside that as an individual one is serving a purpose - is about something - is really what matters and what others may or may not have to say about it is of little consequence.  Am I fulfilling my destiny?  Doing what I'm fated to do?  Am I answering my calling?  At the very least, am I not being a waste of space?

So how do you know?  What's the measure, the rule, the method to evaluate these things?

...

Though I'm pretty sure I can answer "yes" or "sort of" to some of the "am I" questions, if I figure it out for sure how to know or evaluate, I'll let you know.  If you know, please be kind enough to share.

I want to see this.

Another movie trailer, but very different from the last one I posted.  :)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zPsLB11POtQ

This is cool.

The things you learn watching a random Fox News show.  This is really neat.  Lasers, 3D, what's not cool about those?!

http://3d.si.edu/

Movie Trailer

If I hadn't seen a commercial, I would have forgotten I've been meaning to post this...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WcIXCok9HPg

My Frustrating Body

I had other plans.  I was going to go to a Bible study and was sad to miss a concert because the times overlapped.  Then my body got other ideas.  So I am at home in my pjs trying to decide if I should/could eat and feeling like my body as a whole and not just my head is throbbing.  Pulsing might actually be a better word because it feels like it's in sync with my pulse.  And as I write this post, I have had the involuntary muscle movements that have been so rare in recent history.  How frustrating!  Not entirely sure what brought it all on.  I was more or less fine until around lunchtime.  Could be a combination of the cold, stress, emotional duress, being super-tired, and my lunch possibly not agreeing with me...wow, that sounds pathetic.  I have such an obnoxious body!  Sometimes I wish there was a way to fire it for being the weakest link, or put my body in time out for misbehaving, or trade it in for a newer and better model.  This is one of those times.

So I will figure out what in my pantry and fridge sounds tolerable to eat.  Then I will curl up in my pjs under a blanket and stare at the television for the rest of the evening.  In my bedtime prayers, I will include a prayer that I feel better tomorrow because having to drag myself through the day is no fun.  I know this because I have to do it often.

On The Importance Of Comfort Food

We all have them.  There are certain foods that for some reason have the power to make us feel good or at least feel better than we did before making and eating them.  If you sat down and made a list - what are your favorite foods - those are your comfort foods.  Generally, they are the foods we grew up with, the ones that remind us of family or home, of happy or special times.  Now imagine you could never eat your favorite food - your ultimate comfort food(s) - never ever again.  How sad would you be?  How often would you crave the now off limits food?  And how good would it feel to then finally get to have that food again?  Can you not feel your muscles relax and your stress melt away just imagining that moment?

If you are lucky, your comfort foods are something healthy and inexpensive.  But I would imagine that most of us have potentially unhealthy but relatively inexpensive comfort foods like mashed potatoes, macaroni and cheese, and other basics from childhood.  If you are anything like me, the cupboard is kept stocked with all we need to make those foods.

So why bring it up?  Who cares, Corrine?  Well, me, and it's my blog, so I can write about comfort food if I want.

It occurred to me tonight how important my comfort foods are to me.  I've been so stressed...so, so, so stressed.  Tonight I made tomato soup and grilled cheese for dinner (supper, whatever).  As I started eating I noticed that I really was starting to feel more relaxed.  I'm craving pizza and macaroni and cheese and really, those mashed potatoes don't sound too bad either.  Obviously, it would likely not be wise to eat those all in the same day or to eat like that all the time, but when the stress is excessive and the craving overwhelming, good heavens, just go ahead and eat those things that actually do take the edge off.  There are so many worse options.  If a bit of mac n' cheese can give me a few moments of feeling not-as-stressed, I'm going to eat some mac n' cheese...well...fake cheese, and expensive, organic pasta, fake milk...okay, not "real" mac n' cheese and that makes me sad, but I'll take what I can get.  And a few extra moments of even a little more relaxed is worth a few more calories than are recommended, I think.  I'll eat healthier when I'm less stressed...if I'm lucky, that will be sooner versus later.

A Few Links

Sometimes I run across things I want to share and seldom do I remember or take the time to sit down and post them.  Tonight I managed to put a few here.

If you're watching TV in Nebraska, you've seen the commercial to which Stossel is referring in this clip from his show.  I'm always interested to find local items hitting the national stage.
http://video.foxbusiness.com/v/3201013702001/senate-candidate-wants-to-move-the-us-capitol-to-nebraska/?playlist_id=933116642001#sp=show-clips

I ran into this while looking for something else.  It was really interesting...if you're into this sort of thing.  I think I need to add the book to my annual Wish List.  :)
http://video.foxnews.com/v/3217279753001/jesus-life-as-a-jew/#sp=show-clips

This is a written article on which I saw a report on "Shepherd Smith Reporting."  It was more interesting to see/hear than to read, but still...and I don't think it applies to only people over 55.
http://www.foxnews.com/health/2014/02/17/extreme-loneliness-risk-factor-for-premature-death/

There you go...in case you had nothing better to do than watch or read what I've been finding interesting.  :)

I need a new job.

I need a different job.  Is there not something I could do and maybe even would enjoy that would allow me to stay home in my pajamas if I wanted?  Not that I can't work from home as needed now, but I suspect if I started to make a habit of it, even my really awesome boss would start to question things.  So I just need to find something else to do...that pays the bills...and is legal...

A Debate to Debate

Have two and a half hours to kill?  Or maybe you just find the evolution versus creation debate positively fascinating.  Last night Bill Nye (yes, the science guy) debated the founder of the Creation museum (found in Kentucky) on evolution versus creation.  I think both made some good points.  Found Mr. Nye's demeanor a bit...prideful and dismissive.  Mr. Hamm, while sporting a properly lovely Aussie accent, lacked a sort of luster to his character.  They certainly didn't solve the mystery during the course of the 2.5 hours, but it was still interesting.

The recording of the debate can be found on YouTube.  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6mAyBwhiAJ8

The website that streamed it live is http://debatelive.org/ and it appears to have other debates coming and going and responding to previous debates and whatever.  Might be worth checking out.

Run, Samson, Run!

I don't like the cold.  Snow is pretty and provides needed moisture for the ground, but that's about where my appreciation for it tends to stop.  Samson, on the other hand...er...paw...?

"Yea!  It's snowing!  Yea!"

"Have I run over there yet?"

"Woohoo!  A fresh, untouched path!"

"Wee!  I love the snow!"

"Best snow day ever!"

Who's a happy dog?  Samson is!

Product Review

I am loving this product!  Who knew you could get good, crispy bacon from a microwave?  I also have the egg sandwich thing (which was covered by a large "microwave" graphic the last time I was on the website).  I highly recommend the products for the microwave.

https://www.nordicware.com/store/category/microwave#.UvJshXmYbIU

Did you see this?

If you were watching any of the SuperBowl pre-game business, maybe you saw Bill O'Reilly's interview with President Obama before the game.  If not, here's a link.

http://www.billoreilly.com/site/rd?satype=13&said=12&url=%2Fvideo%3FchartID%3D310%26pid%3D18076

But, wait!  There's more!  There was more or a second interview done after the pre-game portion.  It aired on "The O'Reilly Factor" tonight.  Here's a link to that.

http://www.billoreilly.com/site/rd?satype=13&said=12&url=%2Fb%2FFull-Transcript-and-Unedited-Video-of-Bills-Second-Interview-with-Obama%2F-309464871445087104.html

I found them both very interesting and am glad I was able to watch them.  I hope the links work for you!

The Very Long Week

Last Friday I was surprised by a call from the current foster mom.  Next thing I know, I'm scheduled to have company for a week - from Sunday to Sunday.  Sunday night Jenna was dropped off at my home.  Monday morning she woke up with pink eye.  So I worked from home Monday and Tuesday.  Wednesday I had barely gotten into the office when I got called by the school.  She had calmed down by the time I got there, so I went back to work.  That night I found out from an Orkin man that my attic is the warmest room in my house and I have practically no insulation up there.  Thursday I had to leave work early to pick up Kiddo.  Hearing that the longer we sat on the steps pouting the less chance there was of going to rehearsal motivated movement and the rest of the day went fine.  Friday we were at the doctor again for an infection on her fingers, and other maladies.  The rest of the day went fine...maybe even normal.  Saturday was fine - even good as "I don't like..." and "I'm not eating that" turned into nodding when I asked if she wanted more.  Today was more or less okay.  We ate leftovers for lunch.
Almost every night for the last week (or longer), I have worked an hour or more from home.  Add rehearsals, and daily activities...I'm exhausted...and curious as to the level of sanity I possess.  And yet, I continue to survive to survive another day...Maybe one of those days I will take a nap...preferably somewhere warm.  Have you seen the weather report for Lincoln?  Brrrr!  No wonder my body hurts!

The Latest...

Talked to the caseworker yesterday afternoon.  Everything is on hold.  The therapist says that Jenna says she likes me and likes spending time with me.  That is good.  However, she thinks she will be moving in with a biological (or half bio) sister in Wisconsin.  ...What?!...

Well, they found out about this person about two months ago.  They are required to do their due diligence and fully vet this person.  Apparently, Wisconsin didn't exactly jump on things, so everything there is still in process.  That means everything with me is on hold until that is all sorted out.  The caseworker does not expect the sister to be approved.  But, as the process needs to complete itself, for now Jenna will stay with her current foster family.  If when the sister stuff comes to a close I still want to move forward, then we move forward.

So there is more waiting.  Could be worse.  Could be better.  But at least she likes me!

Aaaaaannnd...we wait...some more

Jenna went back to her foster home Saturday afternoon.  She was very excited to see her foster mom and foster sister.  Monday I heard from the caseworker that she had asked the therapist to talk to Jenna to try to get an idea for how she would feel to move from where she now is to my house.  That conversation was to take place on Tuesday night.  Yesterday I heard from the caseworker again when she emailed me to let me know she was playing phone tag with the therapist.  And that was the last I heard.

So the waiting continues.  Meanwhile, I have had to give up being in "Fiddler on the Roof" which makes me very sad.  Of all the shows to not get to do!  Choir starts again in about a week.  Work has been intensely stressful.  I think this weekend waiting will look a lot like being lazy, asleep, or both.